A DC airport ticket agent offers
some examples of
'why' our country is in trouble:
1. I had a New
HampshireCongresswoman (Carol
Shea-Porter) ask for an
aisle seat so that her hair
wouldn't get messed up by being
near the window. (On an
airplane!)
2. I got a call from a
KansasCongressman's (Moore)
staffer (HowardBauleke), who
wanted to go
to Capetown. I started to explain the
length
of the flight and the passport information, and
then he
interrupted me with, ''I'm not trying to make
you look stupid,
but Capetown is in Massachusetts
....''
Without trying to make him
look stupid, I calmly explained, ''Cape Cod is in
Massachusetts ,
Capetown is in Africa ''
his response -- click.
3. A senior
Vermont
Congressman (Bernie Sanders)
called, furious about a Florida
package we did. I asked what was
wrong with the vacation in
Orlando . He said he was
expecting an ocean-view room. I tried
to
explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the
middle of the state.
He replied, 'don' t lie to me, I
looked
on the map and Florida is a very thin state!'' (OMG)
4. I got a call from a
lawmaker's wife (LandraReid) who asked, ''Is it possible to
see England from
Canada ?''
I said, ''No.''
She said, ''But they look so close
on the map.''
(OMG, again!)
5. An aide for a cabinet
member(JanetNapolitano) once called and
asked if he could
rent a car in Dallas . I pulled up
the reservation and noticed
he had only a 1-hour
layover in Dallas . When I asked him why
he wanted to rent a car, he said, ''I heard Dallas was
a
big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save
time.'' (Aghhhh)
6. An Illinois
Congresswoman (JanSchakowsky) called last week. She needed to
know how it
was possible that her flight from Detroit left at
8:30
a.m., and got to Chicago at 8:33
a.m.
I explained that Michigan
was
an hour ahead of Illinois , but she couldn't understand
the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went
fast,
and she bought that.
7. A New York
lawmaker,
(JerroldNadler)
called and asked, ''Do airlines put your
physical description on
your bag so they know whose luggage
belongs to whom?'' I said, 'No,
why do you ask?'
He replied, ''Well, when I checked
in with the
airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said
(FAT), and
I' m overweight. I think that's very rude!''
After putting him on hold for a
minute, while I
looked into it. (I was dying laughing). I came
back and explained
the city code for Fresno , Ca. is (FAT -
Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just putting
a
destination tag on his luggage.
8. A Senator John
Kerry
aide (LindsayRoss)
called to inquire about a trip package to
Hawaii .
After going over all the cost info, she asked,
''Would
it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the
train to
Hawaii ?''
9. I just got
off the phone with a freshman Congressman, Bobby
Bright from Ala who asked, ''How do I know which
plane to get on?''
I asked him what
exactly he meant, to which he replied, ''I was
told my flight number is 823, but none of these
planes have that number on them.''
10. Senator
DianneFeinstein called and said, ''I need to
fly to Pepsi-Cola , Florida . Do I have to get on
one of those little computer planes?''
I asked if she meant
fly to Pensacola , FL on a commuter plane.
She said, ''Yeah,
whatever, smarty!''
11. Mary
Landrieu, La. Senator called and had a question
about the documents she needed in order to fly to
China . After a lengthy discussion about
passports, I reminded her that she needed a visa.
'Oh, no I don't. I've been to Chinamany times and
never had to have one of those.''
I double checked and
sure enough, her stay required a visa. When I told
her this she said, ''Look, I've been to China four
times and every time they have accepted my
American Express!''
12. A New Jersey
Congressman (John Adler) called to make
reservations, ''I want to go from Chicago to
Rhino, New York .''
I was at a loss for
words. Finally, I said, ''Are you sure that's the
name of the town?''
'Yes, what flights do
you have?'' replied the man.
After some searching,
I came back with, ''I' m sorry, sir, I've looked
up every airport code in the country and can' t
find a rhino anywhere."
''The man retorted,
''Oh, don' t be silly! Everyone knows where it is.
Check your map!''
So I scoured a map of
the state of New York and finally offered, ''You
don' t mean Buffalo , do you?''
The reply? ''Whatever!
I knew it was a big animal.''
Now you know why
the Government is in the shape that it's
in!
Could anyone be
this DUMB?
YES, THEY WALK
AMONG US, ARE IN POLITICS, AND THEY CONTINUE TO BREED..
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