Monday, December 8, 2008



I see Amazon (to whom I am generally well disposed, even though they grossly underestimated demand and have thus managed to sell out of my own Christmas single) are having a special sale called "The Twelve Days Of Holiday".

That's an even lamer PC rewrite than the one offered up by the Royal Canadian Mint a couple of holiday seasons back to promote their range of grisly commemorative coin sets - "The Twelve Days Of Giving":

On the first day of giving, my true love gave to me...

Etc. Even by the standards of the age, the ability of the marketing department to combine the reflex urge to eliminate all references to the offensive word "Christmas" with the savvy to exploit beloved old songs about, er, Christmas is impressive.


Saturday, December 06, 2008

Don we now our vague apparel [Mark Steyn]


Further to what I wrote above about Amazon's "Twelve Days Of Holiday" promotion, a reader complained to them about their decision not to use the word "Christmas" and received by way of response a canned e-mail apologizing instead for their use of the word "Christmas":

"Please accept our sincere apologies if you were offended by the use of the word "Christmas" on our website. Our intention in referring to Christmas is to give specific ordering guidance for a specific holiday, not to exclude other faiths."

I wonder if it might be time for Amazon to crank up a computer-generated apology sincerely apologizing if you were offended by receiving the incorrect sincere apology.

I'm Dreaming of a Sincere Apology [Mark Steyn]

Following my post yesterday on's bizarre "Twelve Days Of Holiday" campaign, an unseasonably intemperate reader wrote:

Don't like Amazon? Don't shop at it then, you clot. Nobody really gives a damn if some online retailer is insufficiently Christian for your tastes. Nobody.

Oh, I don't know. The "Twelve Days Of Holiday" promotion has now been amended to "The Twelve Days Of [click here for offensive C-word]". So, if I'm a clot, I'm Rudolph the Red-Nosed Clot in whose wake you run-of-the-sleigh clots follow.

To be honest, I mildly regret this instant corporate capitulation as sometime Cornerite Michael Graham has started up a poll to find out your favorite "Twelve Days Of Holiday" song. As I write, the runaway winner is "It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Thursday".

[UPDATE: Things are going from bad to Norse:

Some may find it offensive to officially promote the Norse gods, so I believe it would be best to quit using terminology such as "Tuesday", "Wednesday", "Thursday" and "Friday" for our weekdays. Clearly, "It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Thursday" is highly offensive to those who do not worship Thor, and thus a more appropriate holiday song should be "It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like The Fifth Day of the Week".

But only if you assume the week begins on Sunday, as so many C-word obsessives do. Another reader writes:

Surely we should avoid offending those who do not worship Thor, god of thunder. So it should be “It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like the 4th day of the week”.

How about "It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Lunchtime"?

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